Making Friends
| If you have an easy time making friends, this message is not for you. If you are worried about making friends, you will want to read this. Some kids who are gifted find they have a hard time making friends. Why would this be? Understand that there is nothing wrong with you! When you are gifted, you have something called "uneven development." This means your social skills - making friends is a social skill - are the same as your age-mates, but your interests are more like older kids. So, now you have a dilemma. Do you try to make friends with older kids who think more like you or do you try to make friends with kids who are your age but who don't think like you? If you're having trouble making friends, this might be the reason. People who are similar to us are called our "peer group." So, in your case, would your peer group be the older kids or the younger ones? Maybe neither. Here are three things that might help you find kids who are more like you. One way is to enroll in a special program designed for gifted kids. Advanced classes and summer programs can help you find your peer group. The kids who will be there will be a lot like you. They will be your age, but they will have interests more like yours. They will learn quickly, just like you do. They will remember facts easily, just like you do. You may find you make some lasting friendships in these situations. Since you might not live by these kids, e-mail can be a good way to stay in touch until the next program. Kids who are gifted usually love to read. They often love reading more than other kids. I was the person who read under my blanket at night using a flashlight. I would have read all night, but my parents usually figured out what I was doing and stopped me. If they hadn't, I would never have gotten any sleep. Sometimes the characters in books can teach you a lot about making friends. If you go to a library or even a bookstore, there is a way the people there can find Children's or Young Adult Literature about the things that are worrying you - one of those might be making friends. Then you can read about what other kids did when they were having this problem. Getting involved in a sport can be a very good way to make friends. Maybe you think you are the world's worst athlete. But I promise you, there is something athletic everyone can do. Maybe you don't want to play football or baseball. However, you might like cycling or running or cross-country skiing. Activities like this are excellent ways to meet people who might become your friends. So, if you find you're having trouble in this area - with this social skill - try those things. Ask your parents to help you earn the money so that you can go to a program designed for gifted kids. Find books about smart kids who are having the same problem you are and read what they did to solve it. Get involved in some kind of sport. These steps should help you on the way to finding friends you can really enjoy. Summer Programs/Camps Programs at the University of Wisconsin-Stevens Point College Days for Kids Youth In College Destination ImagiNation & First Lego League |